Universal
Soldier: The Return (1999)
8/19/99 - Previewed "Universal Soldier 2." I thought
it was really good cheese, making jumps into spectacular
insanity. I mean, one minute Van Damme and his obvious
love interest are in a burning building, and the next
they're in a car driving down the street. And the dialogue,
beautiful ethereal cheese. Then, suddenly, we realized
the film had been put together wrong, reels 3 and 4
were reversed. It took us 3 hours to fix it and see
it all in sequence, where it suddenly lost all it's
eclectic charm. This thing is the biggest piece of shit
you can pay money to see this year! It does have the
biggest explosion I've ever seen on film, I believe,
at the end though. Got home at 4:30am
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