Scary Tales: The Return of Mr. Longfellow (2003) (AKA
Scary Tales 2)
If, as Steve Martin postulated,
comedy is not pretty, then horror is its even uglier
step-cousin. Horror is, in fact, pretty hard to pull
off. These days horror isn't suspense or drama or
even a thriller, those genres have been differentiated
by the aforementioned titles. Horror, rather, these
days is either gore or camp. "Scary Tales 2" is the
latter.
Filmmaker Michael Hoffman at least
realizes here that horror just doesn't work as a film
genre anymore. So, he does the wisest thing possible
and simply makes his anthology of titular, supposedly
scary tales a lot of fun to watch. His stories are
cool and unique this time albeit totally fanciful
and farcical. These stories are goofy step-cousins
of "The Twilight Zone" but at least they are fun and
entertaining.
In the original set of "Scary Tales,'
Hoffman cast kooky Joel Wynkoop as Mr. Longfellow,
a temporary employment agent who enjoyed scaring his
clientele by showing them what might happen if they
took one of the jobs he offered. Hoffman used this
inter-connective tissue to piece together a series
of three tales that were not scary, interesting or
enjoyable. The only thing the first film had going
for it was Wynkoop whose perfectly subtle campiness
made the film, at least, bearable.
In "The Return of Mr. Longfellow,"
Hoffman uses the wonderfully delightful Wynkoop again
in the film's connective tissue. Here, however, he
has much better stories to piece together. And he
allows Wynkoop to be even more campy and over-the-top.
The effect is knee-slapping hilarious!
The stories here are far-fetched
and silly, of course, like most so-called horror films
are, but Hoffman has so much fun with it that it's
hard to care. The first story is actually quite inventive
and fun albeit ridiculous. It has a humorous and crazy
twist at the end of it that somehow makes it work.
The second story involves Bill Cassinelli
as Dennis Fry, returning from the first film as well.
Here zombies come into play but in such a funny and
interesting way that its easy to forgive the film
its ridiculousness. Cassinelli even gets the girl
and the upper hand on everyone. That's the joke here!
And it's funny. And Hoffman's end credits promise
that Fry will return as the star of "Scary Tales 3."
(Surely he'll find a way to have Wynkoop return again
too... he's so devilishly fun to have around). This
mid-section of the film has really good special effects
as well.
While the third segment may seem
again even more like a rip- off of some old anthology
series on TV, like "Night Gallery" or "One Step Beyond,"
it's still well-done, with interesting visuals and
very good acting. Everyone takes everything very seriously
here. Except for Wynkoop. And that's what makes the
film work. If everyone camped it up, this film would
be crap. But Hoffman wisely keeps all his other actors
and crew believing that they are actually creating
a real horror film here. It's the Ed Wood school of
campy fun. It just wouldn't be so great if everyone
was in on the joke. Only the audience, and by extension
our tourguide Wynkoop, are allowed to be in on it.
There are lots of horror cameos
by small time actors that aficionados of the genre
will surely recognize. Robert Z'Dar (of "Maniac Cop"
fame) as well as some actress from the "Sleepaway
Camp" films make appearances. The film looks very
nice for a straight-to-DVD release and the stories
are interesting enough to keep you involved. But,
as with the first film, it is truly Wynkoop here that
deserves the credit for making the film work. He's
just having so much damn fun here that its infectious!
Note:
Hoffman has a voice cameo as a police
dispatcher. He also takes credits in scripting, producing,
editing, cinematography, sound and visual effects.
Actor Jason Daly, who plays killer
Don Liefert, also co- scripts, co-produces and co-directs
here. He also takes credits in editing, cinematography,
set design, make-up effects, and visual effects.
Actors Joe Estevez and Z'Dar also
co-produce.
Viewed on a DVD provided by the
filmmaker.
