#6

John Turturro's new film "Illuminata" is showing here. I would like to see it. Also the rerelease of "Stop Making Sense." And you can't live here and not see "Hands on a Hardbody." It's been playing at the Dobie for over a year. I better see it before they kick me outta town.

I was listening to 97.1, Free Radio Austin, and I was thinking about how unhappy the DJ sounded. I've been thinking a lot about how men today have to act all tough and macho and hard because this is the only socially acceptable substitute for sexual aggresssion, and how this is carried to the Nth degree by black and hispanic males... Anyway... I was thinking how if I were on Radio Free Austin getting to play the songs I wanted to play, I would be the happiest guy in the world. The DJ came back on, after playing another modern punk song and started talking about how he doesn't usually do shout outs but the next song was for his friend Chad, who may or may not be listening and probably getting off work right about now, and then he said, "Chad, I have mad love in my heart for you man..." He then slightly chuckled, seemingly embarassed by his own tenderness, as he announced the next song, a sweet little tune by the Circle Jerks....

The people of Austin need to learn 3 things...

1. Panhandlers are not "local color"

2. Red lights can cycle through on a speed faster than every 5 minutes

3. Sometimes you just have to dig in and clean shit up...

(Hey, I waited 6 weeks to start bitching!)

I was trying to find my New Radicals CD in the industrial sculpture wasteland that my apartment has become (I want more large electric cords snaking thru the shag carpet)... anyway, I couldn't find it. so I put on my new Ben Lee CD instead... I like it. I was thinking about how I wish I could have broken thru the barriers when I was in radio and played some cool punk and new wave. But now we have alt_rock stations which have proven that even the repetition of awesome alternative songs still breeds contempt... I was thinking about a line in the New Radicals CD that says something about a girl feeling different and unique as she listens to a song by some obscure band and how he wonders how she would feel if she thought about all the other people "listening to that same obscure band..."

I saw "Illuminata" today at Regal's Arbor 7, a nice, plush multiplex in the north side of town which is so bland and silicon... But the presentation of the superb film was ruined by 3 factors

1. The masking was way off

2. The first reel had a sound problem

3. They started making noise in the lobby during the climax of the film. ARRRGGHHHHHH...

Got to start being more sympathetic to the people who come to my theaer to see a film and complain... I feel their pain... but I won't tomorrow....

Seemingly embarrased by his own tenderness
he smiles as he slides his hand down my thigh
turning his eyes shyly aside
and turning his head to follow


the length of his neck
the length of his fingertips
in a length of his hair in his eyes
lies surprise and shy sorrow


the descent of his gracefulness
disappearance of kisses meant
I sigh as he catches his breath
a caress deep and hollow


seeking peace in our kingdom
the peace in his fingertips
the peace of the sleepless

awakened tomorrow


- lodger 99

8/26 - It has become a Thursday ritual. I get up somewhere between noon and 2pm. I never work Thursday morning at the theater because Thursday is our end of the week and on Thursday night I am drowned in paperwork and computer work. I go somehwere for lunch that I know will have the Austin Chronicle, usually Threadgill's or Hut's Hamburgers, and read it while I eat my lunch. Which is, you know, exactly what I did today, being as it's a ritual and all.

THIS WEEK'S AUSTIN CHRONICLE ALERT: There is some sort of Austin Filmmaker's film festival series or something I don't quite understand. But, anyway, this week they are going to show Adam Goldberg's "Scotch and Milk." Goldberg is an awesoem actor who was in "Saving Private Ryan" as well as playing Chandler's weird roommate for a bit on "Friends." Anyway, he made a film a couple years back and they are going to show it Sunday night at the Alamo Draft House. Oh yeah... IT'S FREE. Double oh yeah... GOLDBERG IS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE! I'm so fucking in! I don't know if he's from Austin or what but I don't care. I am freaking. Read ahead to see if I actually go and if Goldberg is actually there.

Actually, it is the Austin Film Society's "Filmmaker's Week," where 3 directors will show their films for free and be present for a Q&A. They include James Benning ("Four Corners") on Sat 8/28 at Texas Union and Loretta Todd (a documentary called "Today is a Good Day: Remembering Chief Dan George") on Mon 8/30 at UT. Interesting.

Coming 9/3 to Austin - "Rock Opera" at Alamo Draft House and "Twin Falls Idaho" at the Dobie. "Rock Opera" looks like a local video type prodcution movie. Timmy and I saw a preview for it at the Alamo a few weeks ago and it looks funny and worthwhile. ALWAYS READ THE FINE PRINT: 9/3 is the world premier of "Rock Opera" with Richard Linklater and Live Music. Tickets available now. I called and they are like $12 or something.

More music schtuff

9/6 - Bellamy Brothers - Mangos

9/9 - Kinky Friedman - Saxon Pub

9/10 - Merle Haggard - Stubbs

9/11 - Jerry Jeff Walker - Stubbs

9/15 - Bob Dylan and Paul Simon - Frank Erwin Center

9/16 - Little Feat and Dr. John - Lazona Rosa

9/17 - Tom Petty & HB - Frank Erwin Center

9/23 - They Might Be Giants - Lazona Rosa

10/2 - Loudon Wainwright III - Cactus Cafe

10/7 - Willie Nelson - Stubbs

10/9 - Paul Rodriguez (comedy) - The Backyard

10/10 - Robert Palmer - Lazona Rosa

E! TV is doing the E! True hollywood story of Kristy McNichol. Her brother Jimmy is on it and he's just as foxy as he was 20 years ago!

And when am I gonna get invited to a frat party?

My first film "event" in Austin where I met a director!

Saw "Speedway Junky" on 8/28/99 as part of the Austin Gay and Lesbian Independent Film
Festival. The director, an extremely nice man, was in attendance and did a Q&A session.
Among other tales was the story of hiring JTT to play a bisexual teen hustler in the film.Balthazar Getty had been hired to play the role of Steven but showed up incapacitated and unable to stand, (read: drunk or on drugs)let alone act. Perry was given 48 hours to find a new teenage "name actor" or the film would be scraped. JTT was on hiatus during the summer from "Home Improvement" and accepted the role after being faxed pages of the script.

It was funny, he said that JTT told him he "could do anything to him..."(We all waited, almost afriad to laugh)... "you know, like fuck up his hair..."

I asked several questions of the director, Nickolas Perry. It was cool and I liked a lot of his answers although some seemed rather bland and promotional. The first thing I asked was "who turned you down" (since it has so many teens playing hustlers in it) and he said no one.

I asked him about a few specific scenes. I asked him if it had always been called "Speedway Junky." He said yes. I got to shake his hand.

The film was pretty bad.

Questions I wanted to ask:

"Have you ever even met a gay person?"
(He is a gay man)

"So, how many times have you watched 'Midnight Cowboy' anyway?

"Did you ever take it in to your pretty little head to do something original?"

and

"How do you sleep at night?"

I saw a couple of people I have meet at agliff events tonight, including a guy named John who stopped me in the parking lot after the film. We discussed it for about 45 minutes. He was very nice.

Also - Jim Fall who directed "Trick" was in the audience.

What's up with that Gap cords commercial where the model zombies sing Donovan's "Mellow Yellow" and everyone is in drab corporate blue and gray?

I Saw "Scotch and Milk" at the Alamo Draft House on 8/29/99 with Adam Goldberg and director Richard Linklater in attendence. Linklater introduced the film and Goldberg did a short Q&A after the film. It was a very good film. Let me know if you want the review.

As I was leaving the theater, the most amazing thing happened. I was walking out and some folks were gathered on the sidewalk in front of the theater. There was a cute young person there and for a moment I thought,"Oh damn, it's a cute lesbian." Then I could see it was a guy, a cuteguy!I thought I recognized him from seeing him somewhere around town or at the Austin Gay and Lesbian Film Festival last night or something. You know, I notice cute guys everywhere. Then, all of this in my mind in the seconds it takes me to walk past the group, I
realize it is Wiley Wiggins, who also starred in "Dazed and Confused." I freaked silently to myself and waited until I got to the corner before I couldn't stop from giggling out loud like a schoolgirl. I so desperately wanted to turn back but for what reason? To say "Hi?" To act like a schoolgirl and feel completely foolish?

I was in Ausitn. I live in fucking Austin. I have seen 4 film directors(Goldberg and Linklater tonight and Nickolas Perry and Jim Fisk last night) in 2 days. And now I have seen Wiley Wiggins. It scares the fuck out of me.

What the fuck am I doing here?
There is something devastating about fantasy and
reality merging together! It exhilarates you and makes
you feel so incredibly alone at the exact same time.

peace, sweet angels!